September 5, 2010

Portland and Zaron

On Wednesday, Zaron mentioned that he was heading to Kumoricon (anime convention) in Portland, Oregon on Friday, but that the actual convention didn't start until Saturday. So, I figured this was a great time to be a gigantic hilarious fanboy and be like "I CAN MEET ZARON IN PERSON!!!!" Getting there and back in one day wasn't feasible, so they said I could crash with them for a night, and I ended up riding a train there.

I took a bus to the train and everything was peachy, except the guy next to me was apparently very social. As a result, me not talking vary much and just looking out the window eventually prompted him to say something to the effect of, "Do I make you nervous?" Well, now you sure fucking do!

Got off the train, found light rail station, tried to call Zaron but he couldn't hear me, then proceeded to be scared shitless of what I can only presume are gang members hanging around there with boomboxes cranking out distorted hiphop. Meanwhile, I am a skinny, white middle-class male with luggage who clearly doesn't know where he is. Zaron called back while I was there, having apparently moved to a quiet location, and I told him that I would just call him back when I got to the hotel. Now he knows why I said that.

I was glad I scoped out the area with Google streetview first because my stop wasn't named what I thought it would be named. Finding the hotel with the convention, however, was very easy.

"Is that.... Is that supposed to be Cloud? Is that hair blue? What the f-"

The convention was a hilarious disaster. Zaron's friend, LardMan, recorded them starting at the beginning and walking all the way down to the end. It took 2 and a half minutes. They had been there about a half hour before I arrived, at which point I just laughed and wandered around the convention, staring at all the crazy costumes. There was inu'yasha, umbreon, like 4 people with keyblades, and this guy with a GIANT PLASTIC SUNFLOWER. A few girls with cat ears and the wackiest hairdos I have ever seen. I thought some of them had found a way to violate the laws of physics.

Almost the first thing Zaron gave me was this. The night before they left for the convention, he said he was drawing something and couldn't find his markers and would have to use crayola so I laughed at his misfortune and wondered aloud what pointless thing he was drawing. Then he told me "You wouldn't be laughing if you knew what it was." Hence, upon viewing the amazing masterpiece that he made just for me, I, of course, exclaimed "YOU ASSHOLE!"

The irony.

After it took them like an hour to get all registered, we all went out for dinner. I convinced them to go to subway (a whole 2 blocks away) and learned that I walk very fast when excited. Zaron let me flip through his sketchbook and various other things while I asked embarrassing questions and fanboy'd over all the pictures. Their printer failed in amazing new ways because the red ink didn't work, so they are probably printing out greyscale business cards now. Then we went to see SCOTT PILGRIM which is one of the greatest movies ever made and anyone that says otherwise will DIE in a HILARIOUS MANNER.

Then we did stuff and went to sleep.

We were woken up by the cleaning lady going "Oops sorry!" as she closed the door on the hotel room. We then watched a stupid TV show for an hour and I said goodbye, went downstairs, slipped through the crowds and vanished on to the street. Got to the train station and hour early, did stuff, went home, everything was peachy.

And then I realized that I had paid for absolutely nothing the entire time because the only money in my wallet was enough for a bus fare. THEY are the ones with money problems, not me :(


I am totally not creepy at all.

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